Telling Our Children

The adoption process is long.  It is very much hurry up and wait.  Knowing this, we were hesitant to tell our two older children until we were a little further down the line. Especially considering how little control we have through this whole process.  We decided that we would share the news right before our home study began.  That said, the topic of adoption has become part of our daily conversation and we aren’t overly careful about how openly we discuss it in front of them.

One evening in December 2018, we were sitting at our dining table as a family.  Our older two children each in their seats and our 9 month old in her high chair.  Micaiah, who is four, looked around the table and said “mama, I don’t want to have empty seats at our table.”  I about dropped my fork. This is what I had been telling Carl for years now. The exact same phrase. Carl asked Micaiah a probing question, “what do you mean empty seats? Laelyn will sit in that empty seat next to Elliana when she is finished using her highchair.” Micaiah replied, “I know, daddy, but that still leaves one empty seat.  I don’t want any empty seats.” By this time I am so choked up I can barely speak.  I looked at Carl. Carl looked at me.  There wasn’t going to be a more perfect time to tell our children of our plan to adopt. I looked at my son and said, “me either buddy.”

We explained to them what adoption is, found India on the map, and asked them for their thoughts and questions. It was hard for them to comprehend the concept of adoption but we could tell they were trying. We were asked if this child would be a Griffiths, since it would not come from mama’s belly and would this child stay with us forever or just for a little while.  They are processing it all in their own way but they are definitely excited. Part of Elliana’s nightly prayer has been praying for her baby brother in India and that we can bring him home soon.  Micaiah talks regularly about sharing his toys with his new brother.

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